

Newsletter for
July 2009
The following members
would appreciate a visit or a card from you!
IN NURSING HOMES
Eaglecrest
P. O. Box
338
Ash Flat, AR 72513
Orville Alveshire
Bill Garver
CONCERNS
Orville Alveshire
Cy Ault
Lynda Bertram
Pat Newman Day
(sister of Bob Newman)
Abi Deming
Delferd Deming
Nancy Garrett
Bill Garver
Allene Giles
Al Hasbrock
(Earlene Hulshizer’s brother)
Barbara LaFollette
Neecie Larsen
Martha McGinnis
Jean McNalley
Alan Mayenschein
Maxene Mayenschein
Susan
Maxwell
Berneice
Murphy
Shelley Murphy
(Don Luebken’s sister)
JULY USHERS & GREETERS
07/05
- Barbara & Dub Lyerly
Royston Morris
09/12 –
Kathy & DeWaine Buelow
Elden Boyd
07/19 –
Donna Boyd
Barbara Mohr
Anna Ortery
07/26 –
Emily Jackson
Al Mayenschein
Al Voorhies
JULY COFFEE SERVERS
07/05 –
Joan Gardner
07/12 –
07/19 –
07/26 –
Martha McGinnis
Al Mayenschein
Notice: You will find the sign-up sheets on the bulletin board for
ushers/greeters and coffee servers. As you can see, we need help!!
JULY LAY LEADERS
07/05 –
Verna Mae Newman
07/12 –
Royston Morris
07/19 –
Joan Gardner
07/26 –
Midge Pritchard
PRAYER LIST FOR CHURCHES
07/05 – First –
Pocahontas
Presbytery
Staff
07/12 – Trinity –
Little Rock
Spring
River – Hardy
07/19 – First –
Bentonville
Westminster – Little Rock
07/26 – First – Conway
First –
Prairie Grove
SPECIAL TIME
No Report
FELLOWSHIP DINNER
Our
Fellowship dinner will be on July 8th and will be hosted by Joan
Gardner and Barbara Mohr.
THANK YOU
Thank you
to everyone for making my birthday so special – for all the good wishes, cards
and gifts. A special thank you to the choir for the wonderful cake and your
generous gift.
You are so
special to me!
God bless you all,
Avis
Prayer Chain
The Prayer
Chain was formed by the Presbyterian Women some 19 years ago and has been in
existence since. The purpose was the offering of intercessory prayers by the
group on behalf of members, family members, friends and neighbors. It consists
of a coordinator and captains. The coordinator calls the captains, who in turn
call the people in their group.
Anyone
wishing to have someone placed on the Prayer Chain may call Ruth Harrod,
Coordinator, Rev. Stan or the Church Office. The permission of the person to be
placed on the prayer chain should be obtained and we ask how you wish the
request to be worded. It is imperative that the information remain private
within the chain.
Anyone
wishing to be a participant in this Christian endeavor should contact the
Coordinator to be placed on the calling list.
Meetings
of the Prayer Chain will be quarterly in January, April, July and October in the
Calvin Room following church service. It will be a meeting to discuss problems,
procedures and/or suggestions.
Please
consider becoming a part of this group as there can never by too many prayers
offered to our Heavenly Father.
Ruth Harrod
Coordinator, 257-4688
We are responsible for the
effort, not the outcome.
POET’S CORNER
Ain’t
He was
just a little boy,
On a
week’s first day.
Wandering
home for Bible school,
And
dawdling on the way.
He scuffed
his shoes into the grass;
He even
found a caterpillar.
He found a
fluffy milkweed pod,
And blew
out all the “filler.”
A bird’s
nest in a tree overhead,
So wisely
placed up so high
Was just
another wonder
That
caught his eager eye.
A neighbor
watched his zigzag course,
And hailed
him from the lawn;
Asked him
where he’d been that day
And what
was going on.
“I’ve been
to Bible school,”
He said
and turned a piece of sod.
He picked
up a wiggly worm replying,
“I’ve
learned a lot about God.”
“M’mm very
fine way,” the neighbor said,
“For a boy
to spend his time.”
“If you’ll
tell me where God is,
I’ll give
you a brand new dime.”
Quick as a
flash the answer came!
Nor were
his accents faint.
“I’ll give
you a dollar, Mister,
If you can
tell me where God ain’t.”
Author Unknown
You Can’t Fool God
You can
fool the hapless public. You can be a subtle fraud.
You can
hide your little meanness, but you can’t fool God.
You can
advertise your virtues. You can self achievement laud.
You can
load yourself with riches, but you can’t fool God.
You can
criticize the Bible. You can be a selfish clod.
You can
lie, swear, drink and gamble, but you can’t fool God.
You can
magnify your talent. You can hear the world applaud.
You can
boast yourself as somebody, but you can’t fool God.
Author Unknown
We set the sail; God makes the
wind.
LIBRARY
No Report
Begin to weave and God will give you the
thread.
PRESBYTERIAN WOMEN
The combined circles
met for a “Build-Your-Own-Taco-Salad” luncheon on June 16th, and the
Esther Group was the host.
Ms Claudia Marsh was
our speaker from Lyon College and everyone enjoyed her presentation.
If you weren’t present
your missed a great lunch and an even greater speaker!
When God says “no,” it’s because He has
something better in store for you.
TREASURER’S REPORT
As of May 31, 2009
No report
The task ahead of us is never as great as the
Power behind us.
RECALL NOTICE
The Maker of all human
beings (GOD) is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year,
due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.
This is due to a
malfunction in the original prototype units code names Adam and Eve, resulting
in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has
been technically termed “Sub-sequential Internal Non-Morality,” or more commonly
known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.
Some of the symptoms
include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal
emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and
joy
5. Selfish or violent
behavior
6. Depression or
confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who
is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized
repair and service free of charge to correct this defect.
The Repair Technician,
JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering
cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for
repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden
of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the
Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component.
No matter how big or
small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self-control
Please see the
operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers’ Instructions Before Leaving Earth)
for further details on the way of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to
operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer
warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and
will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency
service, call on Jesus.
DANGER: The human
being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the
furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent
contamination of that facility. Thank you for your attention!
GOD
P.S. Please assist
where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may
contact the Father any time by ”knee mail.”
Prayer: don’t bother to give God instructions,
just report for duty.
THINGS TO NOTE
Our
average monthly attendance for the month of May was 45.8.
As you may
have noticed we now have a new Church Treasurer and his name is Dub Lyerly.
Please welcome Dub to his new job and give him your support!
Don’t
forget our meeting June 30th, 10 a.m., in the Fellowship Hall for all
Volunteers who work in the Ministerial Alliance Food Room.
We have
received several applications for the “Jagow Scholarship” and the committee is
in the process of reviewing each individual application.
The trip
to “My Fair Lady” at the Murray Dinner Theater on July 29th is now
full.
There is
another bus ride coming up to Branson during November. Keep a lookout for the
posting of this information shortly on the bulletin board. And, also start
looking for the trip to “Caroling in The Caverns” this year.
You can
find plenty of interesting things on the Church’s web site. Just put
www.presbyteriancv.org into your browser.
Our Church service is
on Radio 104.7, KOOL. Turn it on as soon as you get out of church; 11 a.m. is
the time. And, a telecast is shown on Channel 20 on the local cable network on
Saturday evenings.
Make sure you check the
bulletin board in Fellowship Hall for sign-up sheets and coming events.
Our church was
represented at the 111th Presbytery Meeting held in Searcy on June 6th
by Carol McWilliams as Commissioner and Alan Mayenschein.
Our church hopes to
participate in the Oktoberfest held at Town Center, Cherokee Village, in
October.
It’s my business to do God’s business, and it’s
His business to take care of my business.
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT
A lecturer, when
explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked,
“How heavy is this glass of water?” Answers called out ranged from 20g to
500g. The lecturer replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on
how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a
problem. If I hold it for an hour, I”ll have an ache in my right arm. If I
hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it’s the
same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”
He continued, “And
that’s the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the
time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be
able to carry on. As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a
while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on
with the burden.”
“So, before you retire
home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don’t carry it home. You can pick
it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you’re carrying now, let them down for a
moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you’ve rested. Life is
short. Enjoy it!”
And, then he shared
some ways of dealing with the burdens of life:
·
Accept that some days you’re the
pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.
·
Always keep your words soft and
sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
·
Always read stuff that will make
you look good if you die in the middle of it.
·
Drive carefully. It’s not only
cars that can be recalled by their maker.
·
If you can’t be kind, at least
have the decency to be vague.
·
If you lend someone $20 and never
see that person again, it was probably worth it.
·
It may be that your sole purpose
in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
·
Never buy a car you can’t push.
·
Never put both feet in your mouth
at the same time, because then you won’t have a leg to stand on.
·
Nobody cares if you can’t dance
well. Just get up and dance.
·
Since it’s the early worm that
gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
·
The second mouse gets the cheese.
·
When everything’s coming your
way, you’re in the wrong lane.
·
Birthdays are good for you. The
more you have, the longer you live.
·
You may be only one person in the
world, but you may also be the world to one person.
·
Some mistakes are too much fun to
only make once.
·
We could learn a lot from
crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird
names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
·
A truly happy person is one who
can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
·
When your load is too heavy, let
God help you carry it.
Have an awesome day!
Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but
peace amid the storm.
J
GIGGLES J
One
Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the
church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small
American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring
at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little
boy, and said quietly, “God morning, Alex.”
“Good morning, Pastor,”
he replied, still focused on the plaque. “Pastor, what is this?”
The pastor said, “Well,
son, it’s a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.”
Soberly, they just
stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex’s voice,
barely audible and trembling with fear asked, “Which service, the 8:30 or the
10:30?”
*
* * *
A new pastor was
visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that
someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
Therefore, he took out
a business card and wrote: “Revelation 3:20” on the back of it and stuck it in
the door.
When the offering was
processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added
to it was this cryptic message, “Genesis 3:10.”
Reaching for his Bible
to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20
begins, “Behold I stand at the door and knock.”
Genesis 3:10 reads, “I
heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.”
*
* * *
If you can start the
day without caffeine –
If you can always be
cheerful, ignoring aches and pains –
If you can resist
complaining and boring people with your troubles –
If you can eat the same
food every day and be grateful for it –
If you can understand
you’re your loved ones are too busy to give you anytime –
If you can take
criticism and blame without resentment –
If you can conquer
tension without medical help –
If you can relax
without liquor –
If you can sleep
without the aid of drugs –
THEN YOU ARE PROBABLY
THE FAMILY DOG!!!!
*
* * *
An older couple was
lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a
romantic mood and wanted to talk.
She said: “You used to
hold my hand when we were courting.” Wearily the husband reached across, held
her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.
A few moments later she
said, “Then you used to kiss me.” Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her
a peck on the cheek, and settled down to sleep.
Thirty seconds later
she said, “Then you used to bite my neck.” Angrily, he threw back the
bedclothes and got out of bed.
“Where are you going?”
She asked.
“To get my teeth!”
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